Do you know the best gift you can give, especially in times of sorrow? Yourself! Yesterday, after our son, Jay, and his boys left for Florida; after an alarming phone call that stirred up old and unpleasant memories; after Bev had a bout with intense pain – I was beyond tears, equally sad, tired, and angry. I stood in our kitchen and hurled a kind of prayer at God – “Could You just give us a break?” Not too many minutes later someone inquired, “Is time a good time to come by your home?” When that couple showed up, they brought dinner and something far better – presence! They did not come with questions, solutions, or the latest suggestions about cancer cures. They just offered themselves and prayed with Bev and me in a way that connected Heaven to earth, earnest, faith-filled, Spirit inspired prayer. (So many others have done the same and we are so thankful!)
Sometimes the suffering in our world is so intense that we just want to avert our eyes, don’t we? When I was watching the stories of Syrian refugees, people that were living comfortable middle class lives just a few years ago, crossing ocean waters in little rubber rafts and walking hundreds of miles through hostile Europe to try to find a new home, I wanted to turn the story off. It was simply too sad. When stood next to two grieving parents a week ago, there was a part of me that wanted to escape, to distance myself professionally. But, I also want to be like my Jesus. He never ran from those who suffered, who were in great need. He stood with them, touched them, gave of Himself.
He did not send a message with an angel. He did not write a word in the sky. He came to us!
This, Christian, is the wonder of our faith. “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him." (John 3:16-17, NIV) We call it the Incarnation, God becoming flesh, living as one of us! That despair you felt? He gets it. That temptation that you wrestled with? He knows what it is like. That sense of futility that stalks you? He felt it, too. How do I know that? Because I read this about Him: "since we have a great High Priest who has entered heaven, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to what we believe. This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same testings we do, yet he did not sin. So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most." (Hebrews 4:14-16, NLT) He still shows up, in the Person of the Spirit, to be with us.
One of the identifying marks of the Christian is love and it is a practical one. "Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ." (Galatians 6:2, NLT) Learn the ministry of Presence. Just be there for others, without an agenda, without a need to explain, without a need to change their situation. Often all that is needed is for you to wordlessly say, “You are not alone, I am standing with you.”
Dr. Stephen Davy offers this wisdom for those who desire to care like Jesus did.
- Reject the view that simply quoting scripture will eliminate sorrow. It is not wise to approach a suffering person this way: “Hey, guess what I read this morning in my quiet time? Man, this verse was perfect for you. Oh, by the way, I got you this coffee mug with a smiley face on one side and a picture of the cross on the other.” The Bible is not a Band-Aid.
- Refrain from the temptation to say something profound.
- Refuse any expectation of eliminating grief by your insight. You do not eliminate sorrow; you share it, and by sharing it, you lighten the load.
- Resist the perspective that you must speak in order to express love.
When the Lord finally showed up at Lazarus’ grave … all He did was weep, the Jews saw this and without hearing Him say a word, they said, “See how He loved him” (John 11:36).
Here is a word from the Word. Be inspired to a wonderful ministry that, when practiced wisely, is most healing.
"My beloved friends, let us continue to love each other since love comes from God.
Everyone who loves is born of God and experiences a relationship with God.
The person who refuses to love doesn’t know the first thing about God, because God is love—so you can’t know him if you don’t love.
Everyone who loves is born of God and experiences a relationship with God.
The person who refuses to love doesn’t know the first thing about God, because God is love—so you can’t know him if you don’t love.
This is how God showed his love for us: God sent his only Son into the world so we might live through him. This is the kind of love we are talking about—not that we once upon a time loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to clear away our sins and the damage they’ve done to our relationship with God.
My dear, dear friends, if God loved us like this, we certainly ought to love each other." (1 John 4:7-11, The Message)
______________
Love Them Like Jesus
The love of her life is drifting away
They're losin' the fight for another day
The life that she's known is falling apart
A fatherless home a child's broken heart
You're holdin' her hand you're strainin' for words
You're tryin' to make sense of it all
She's desp'rate for hope
Darkness clouding her view
She's lookin' to you
Just love her like Jesus carry her to Him
His yoke is easy His burden is light
You don't need the answers
To all of life's questions
Just know that He loves her
And stay by her side
And love her like Jesus
Love her like Jesus
The gifts lie in wait in a room painted blue
Little blessing from Heaven would be there soon
Hope fades in the night blue skies turn to gray
As the little one slips away
You're holdin' their hand you're strainin' for words
You're tryin' to make sense of it all
They're desp'rate for hope
Darkness clouding their view
They're lookin' to you
Just love them like Jesus carry them to Him
His yoke is easy His burden is light
You don't need the answers
To all of life's questions
Just know that He loves them
And stay by their side
And love them like Jesus
Lord of all creation
Holds our lives in His hands
The God of all the nations
Holds our lives in His hands
The Rock of our salvation
Holds our lives in His hands
He cares for them just as He cares for you
So love them like Jesus
Love them like Jesus
You don't need the answers
To all of life's questions
Just know that He loves them
And stay by their side
And love them like Jesus
Love them like Jesus
Love them like Jesus
Love them like Jesus
Bernie Herms | Mark Hall
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