When someone catches you doing something right or good and expresses their appreciation or admiration, how do you feel? Great, right? Being valued enriches life. So, let me ask you – are you mostly a critic or an admirer? Don’t read me wrong today. I am not suggesting that we set aside the pursuit of excellence. I am not advocating insincere flattery or mere positivity! I am encouraging genuine love for others that learns to value them for who they are, that takes note of effort and passion as well as accomplishments.
In a recent essay, Elizabeth Corey wrote – “When we admire, we are freed from thoughts of ourselves. The better we are at admiring, the less our egos intrude. And the more we know about the world, the more we find to admire. We can then look with pleasure not only on natural and human beauty, but also on more complex things, such as painting, poetry, philosophy, even moral conduct. The excellence of particular human beings is often the most affecting beauty of all.”
Pride is a terrible hindrance to the expression of admiration. When a person believes himself to be so much better at what he does than another, from that lofty place of selfishness, he will criticize the other. His first thought will be comparison, not appreciation.
Right alongside pride is real giftedness or great skill. Being ‘the best’ can keep us from expressing admiration for the effort of those less able. Their simple errors will be noted and their work likely overlooked at best or worse, spoken of negatively.
Christians are called to humility! Inspired by the Spirit, Paul tells us “Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.” (Philippians 2) Real humility will turn us into encouragers who learn to admire. The net effect will be to call an even better effort from others as we let them know we care for them.
Constant criticism sucks life out of us, doesn’t it? Honest appreciation builds up.
Christians are called to love! Nothing new there but is our love connected to the ordinary situations of life? It is loving to tell another – “I admire the way you do what you do.” A well-known passage from Proverbs 31 includes the words of admiration from a loving husband for his faithful wife - “There are many virtuous and capable women in the world, but you surpass them all!”
Christians are called to worship! At the heart of a life that admires and appreciates is worship for the One who is worthy of our praise. Worship turns our hearts toward God’s character and works. We speak of our praise. “Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom.” (Psalm 145:3) We choose to enter His Presence “…to gaze on the beauty of the Lord and to seek him in his temple.” (Psalm 27:4)
A person who stops demanding things of God, who sets aside the need for reasons and answers, who sees the Lord in His true beauty – learns to worship in Spirit and truth. From that worship of God, we gain the ability to admire the beauty around us in the world and in those with whom we live.
The Word
teaches us to
“Give to the Lord the glory He deserves!
Bring your offering and come into His courts.
Worship the Lord in all His holy splendor.” (Psalm 96)
Yes, let’s teach ourselves to admire, to take note of the little ‘beauties’ that are all around us. Yesterday’s snow here in NJ was a great inconvenience to many, but throughout the day I could not help but notice the wonder that filled my world, the snow-covered branches that gleamed in bright sunshine. That admiration lifted my heart to joy!
The author previously quoted says – “In America we’re told that independence, self-sufficiency, and dogged hard work are among the greatest virtues. I would much prefer to throw in my lot with the admirers. Openness to the beauty of the world, and to the people around me, means that I can be receptive to the unmerited grace that may sometimes, surprisingly, appear. When it does, it is a great blessing—something not to be missed.” How true!
Here is a
word from the Word. Begin with worshipping the Lord and then go find the
admirable in your world.
“One thing I ask from the Lord,
this only do I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the Lord
all the days of my life,
to gaze on the beauty of the Lord
and to seek him in his temple.
For in the day of trouble
he will keep me safe in his dwelling;
he will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent
and set me high upon a rock.” (Psalm 27)
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