Maturity- Being 'in charge' of Me

Are you living like a perpetual teenager with poor impulse control, unable or unwilling to choose the best path when there is no one 'in charge?' One of the frightening things about parenting a teenager is that he old enough to act somewhat independently, but usually is lacking the ability to monitor and regulate his own behavior. For example, when you hand him the keys to the car, you may be confident in his ability to operate the automobile's controls, but you're much less confident about his good judgment. Dr. Henry Cloud writes, "It is one thing to drive safely when you look in the rearview mirror and see a policeman. That is external feedback. It is another thing to drive safely when you're out on the road by yourself. That is maturity." (Integrity, Collins, 2006) Many Christians who ought to be mature in the Lord and capable of making choices that lead to a Christ-honoring life, are still in the grip of their emotions and impulses. Their appetites rage out of control. They appear to be unable to step up to the inconvenient, the unpleasant, or the difficult choices today that would lead them to a better life tomorrow.

I once thought that maturity would free me from making mistakes all together. But that did not factor in two important issues - that I do not always have all the facts I need to make a 'perfect' decision; and I am a sinful man who cannot always life above the temptations of this life because I am broken. I now know that maturity, emotional and intellectual, allows me to step outside of myself and see what I am doing or have done. Maturity causes me to correct my actions, bringing them in line with God's will and acceptable standards, without waiting for someone else to threaten punishment or to enforce the rules. When the mature person realizes that he has made a mistake, first; he owns his choice without shifting blame, and second; he proactively adjusts his actions to avoid compounding the error. Maturity doesn't mean, "I can do it all myself." It means, "I take charge of me and seek whatever resources I need to become the person that God wants me to be."

The Word challenges us to maturity.
"...be mature and full grown in the Lord, measuring up to the full stature of Christ.
...we will hold to the truth in love, becoming more and more in every way like Christ,
...Live no longer as the ungodly do, for they are hopelessly confused.
Their closed minds are full of darkness; they are far away from the life of God because they have shut their minds and hardened their hearts against him. They don’t care anymore about right and wrong, and they have given themselves over to immoral ways. Their lives are filled with all kinds of impurity and greed.

But that isn’t what you were taught when you learned about Christ.
Since you have heard all about him and have learned the truth that is in Jesus, throw off your old evil nature and your former way of life, which is rotten through and through, full of lust and deception.
Instead, there must be a spiritual renewal of your thoughts and attitudes." (Ephesians 4:13-23, NLT)

Do you see the keys to maturity that are revealed in that passage?

There is vision. Look at Christ. Study His life and measure yourself by Him! We won't grow up if we are content to use lesser standards.
There is truth. Know the truth, accept the truth, and relentlessly insist on living in the truth - even when it's not pleasant.
There is choice. Understand that there is right and there is wrong! Then choose. Note the strong action phrase, "throw off your old evil nature." If we want to grow up, we cannot just be passive, waiting for someone to do the hard work for us. We must take the old ways off like old dirty clothes and toss them aside in the trash!

Then the same passage says this - "...put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness." (Ephesians 4:24, NIV) The Word is not telling us to 'put on' as in pretending to be someone we are not, as an actor 'puts on' a costume or makeup to change his appearance. Rather we are to take Christ and put the life He gives us in place in our life! We are called to take the steps necessary to change our behavior so that we are truly holy.

Here at the beginning of 2007, let me encourage you to 'grow up!' If you're making excuses for eating too much, having a mouth that is out of control, or failing to meet God's high expectations - Stop! Tell yourself, "I am 'in charge' of Me!" Prayerfully seek a new vision of who God wants you to be. Face the truth and allow others to hold a mirror up for you. And "put on" Christ. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you to practice the disciplines of grace that create openings into your soul where you are changed from the inside out.

"So come on, let’s leave the preschool fingerpainting exercises on Christ and get on with the grand work of art. Grow up in Christ. The basic foundational truths are in place: turning your back on “salvation by self-help” and turning in trust toward God; ... let's get on with it." (Hebrews 6:1, 3 The Message)