Just being there…

I’m often asked, “When I am called on to comfort a friend who is going through a time of great loss, what should I say, Pastor?” My first counsel is ‘just be there.’ A young man died and his family called me to their home even before his body was taken away. When I arrived, I found the man’s father kneeling by his body silently crying. At that moment, he didn’t need me to quote Bible verses or attempt to mitigate his grief with poetry, so I stood there next to him with a hand on his shoulder for a long time. That is called the ministry of ‘presence.’ It is a way to say, “I will steady you; you’re not alone,” without being intrusive with an overflow of words that can be offensive or irritating to the one who is grieving or suffering. There is a time for wise counsel or comforting words, but without a context of genuine caring words do not mean all that much.

Job, the man who terrible suffering forms the context for a long discussion about the meaning of pain and suffering and God’s sometimes inscrutable purposes, had friends who came to be with him in his trial. We read that "When they saw him from a distance, they could hardly recognize him; they began to weep aloud, and they tore their robes and sprinkled dust on their heads. Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights. No one said a word to him, because they saw how great his suffering was." (Job 2:12-13, NIV)

God, the Holy Spirit, comforts us in the same way. Jesus said that when He returned to the Father’s glory, He would send the “Counselor” who would be with us, indeed, in us. “You will not be left as orphans,” the Lord promised. The Spirit is with us. The question is, ‘are we with Him?’ Yes, it is true that we cannot escape His presence, for He is omnipresent. The Psalmist exults in this singing: "Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast." (Psalm 139:7-10, NIV) However, we can become so enmeshed in life, that we are unaware of His ministering Presence! We can bring ungodliness into our lives that grieve Him and break the closeness with Him. In those times, even though He is as close as our breath, we do not enjoy the steadying sense that God is near.

As our nation suffers, I plead with Believers to practice the ministry of Presence! Hold back the expression of opinions about why this has happened. We don’t know! Refrain from using easy clichés that dismiss the depth of pain that is being felt by hundreds of thousands of suffering people. Instead, be present with loving assurance. A simple, “I’m praying for you,” that comes from the heart is the best expression of caring while many are so raw, so sensitive in their pain. The time for evaluation, for counsel, will come.

For now – let’s be present, and as God, the Spirit, is present in us, His work will be done.

Jerry Scott
www.WashingtonAG.net
"Teaching People how to say "Yes" to God!"