“What an idiot!” How many times have you dismissed another
with that kind of assessment? “I just don’t know how anybody in her right mind could
do that!” With those kinds of dismissive words, we
judge; often without really knowing more than a few facts. Too many I have choked
on regret after I allowed myself to form a pre-mature judgment about the
actions of another. How easy it was for me to think that I knew why someone was
acting in a way that I thought wrong though
I had no actual knowledge of their thought process or unique circumstances.
I know that delaying a response to a ‘problem’ can often
change my perspective yet I still have the tendency to act too quickly! I think
that I "know" the why behind the what, that I have discerned a
nefarious intent. Too late, I sometimes discover that they are acting out of
fear, or they are unaware of options, or they were simply overcome by life. In
this I sin by judging instead of loving! Why do we do judge others so harshly,
so quickly? Prejudice, ignorance, stupidity, arrogance; and fear are several
reasons I've done it. How about you? Let’s complete the thought. Jesus did not
tell us to suspend good sense in our relationships or to drop all standards of
right and wrong. Yes, we are to be
people of mercy and love. And, we must also be able to discern and choose what
is right. We can lovingly, firmly, and
from a place alongside of, not above another, say - "We need to talk,
because the choices you are making are not right. They do not please God. They
are harmful to others and to yourself."
We need judges who can discern guilt and innocence, who can
cut through all the words and make a decision about another’s fate. But, Jesus
says that you and I are not called to that office! Bluntly, He says, "Do
not judge others, and you will not be judged. For you will be treated as you
treat others. The standard you use in judging is the standard by which you will
be judged." He creates an absurd picture to drive home the point - “And why worry about a speck in your
friend’s eye when you have a log in your own?
How can you think of saying to your friend, ‘Let me help you get rid of
that speck in your eye,’ when you can’t see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite!
First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal
with the speck in your friend’s eye." (Matthew 7:1-5, NLT) In another
situation where some men had dragged a sinful woman to Jesus for judgment, He
heard them and then said, “The sinless
one among you, go first: Throw the stone.” (John 8:7).
A person who is not making the right choices needs an advocate before he needs a Judge!
An advocate will take time to listen, will be patient while they work their way
to a place of wholeness. A rush to judgment shuts down dialogue and potentially
destroys relationships. When we are working with those who are erring, we must act to restore, not to punish! Grace looks for a way to save, not to
destroy. This is the heart of our Father.
Are you ‘fed up’ with
somebody who just keeps making poor choices? Are you ready to walk off and
leave some sinner lying the dirt because you have concluded that they are no
longer worth your time? Think again. Yes, there is a time to ‘shake the dust
off our feet’ and move on. Jesus also
taught that. In the same chapter were we are told not to judge we read these
startling words - “Do not give dogs what
is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them
under their feet, and then turn and tear you to pieces." (Matthew 7:6,
NIV) Yes, not everyone is just ‘making
mistakes.’ Some are cruel, evil, and malicious – like a wild dogs. They will not
accept kindness, will destroy you given an opportunity. In those rare
situations, Jesus tells us to move on.
But, we do not have to go calling them names or calling down Heaven’s
judgment! We can step away with a broken heart, praying earnestly for the
Spirit to overwhelm them, to pierce the darkness with Light.
A judge, or an advocate? What will you be today?
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