The Elder Brother Syndrome

Brennan Manning, best known for his book Ragamuffin Gospel, died last week. His life was marked by many successes and repeated failures. He spent years as a Franciscan priest, became an alcoholic, and had a turbulent marriage that finally ended in divorce in 2000. He wrote eloquently of the love of God, whom he referred to as Abba (Biblical - Dad). An experience of Jesus' love changed him. An article in Christianity Today tells it like this: At 3 a.m. on December 13, 1968, he reports, Jesus spoke to him with these words, "For love of you I left my Father's side. I came to you who ran from me, who fled me, who did not want to hear my name. For love of you I was covered with spit, punched and beaten, and fixed to the wood of the cross."

Manning never wanted to be known for loving Jesus, but he wanted everyone to know that Jesus loved him! He was not unaware of his multiple failings, but he refused to live in shameful guilt. The goodness of God and the love of the Father he knew so personally leaked out of the cracks of his life helping others to know that God loved them; not just in spite of their failings, but in them. I must confess that when I read about Manning's death a side of me that I do not like emerged-  spiritual pride. I judged him, wondering why he couldn't 'get it together.'  I realized that too often I slip into the mistake of trying to prove to God that I'm worthy of His love.  

Jesus' famous story of a wayward son who wastes life and then goes home to find that his father has been waiting in love for his return is one of my favorites. The young man failure to understand the depth and nature of his father's love is revealed in his plan to simply ask for employment and his words, "Father, I have sinned against both heaven and you, and I am no longer worthy of being called your son." (Luke 15:18) What did he find? An embrace, forgiveness, restoration, and a party!  The father rejoiced, "for this son of mine was dead and has now returned to life. He was lost, but now he is found.' So the party began." (Luke 15:24, NLT) Good stuff, isn't it?

But that story doesn't end with the sinful son's party. It ends with another character that I understand too well. "Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. 'Your brother has come,' he replied, 'and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.' "The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. But he answered his father, 'Look! All these years I've been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!' "'My son,' the father said, 'you are always with me, and everything I have is yours." (Luke 15:25-31, NIV) Reading Manning's stories has always provoked something of the elder brother syndrome in me!

Pride is a subtle sin. Even after experiencing God's love and grace; accepting that we are made right, not by our own goodness, but by a gift provided fully at Christ's expense, we can slip back to thinking that we now need to prove that we love Him. The focus shifts from "God loves me," to "I love God" and when it does, guilt creeps back into our lives, pushing the joy of the Lord to the side. The open smile of delight in Abba's love is replaced with a grim determination to be 'good enough.'  

This shift is as old as Christianity! It plagued the early church so much so that one of St. Paul's letters, Galatians, is centered on it. The Spirit pleads with us to remain 'in Christ.' "Let me put this question to you: How did your new life begin? Was it by working your heads off to please God? Or was it by responding to God's Message to you? Are you going to continue this craziness? For only crazy people would think they could complete by their own efforts what was begun by God. If you weren't smart enough or strong enough to begin it, how do you suppose you could perfect it?" (Galatians 3:2-3, The Message)

Christian, are you ready to judge those you feel don't meet God's standard?
Are you living in guilt, driven by a sense that you must prove your worthiness of His love?  I confess to both of those. May the Lord deliver me. Pray with me to grasp the truth that is revealed in this word from the Word and to live in the freedom found in grace. 

"If I rebuild what I destroyed, I prove that I am a lawbreaker. For through the law I died to the law so that I might live for God. I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. I do not set aside the grace of God, for if righteousness could be gained through the law, (keeping religious rules) Christ died for nothing!" (Galatians 2:18-21, NIV)

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Oh Lord You're Beautiful

Oh Lord, You're beautiful,

Your face is all I seek.

And when Your eyes are on this child,

Your grace abounds to me.

Oh Lord, please light the fire,

That once burned bright and clear.

Replace the lamp of my first love,

That burns with holy fear.

I want to take Your Word,

And shine it all around.

First, help me just to live it, Lord.

And when I'm doing well

Help me to never seek a crown,

For my reward is giving glory to You.

Keith Green

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