Walking in their shoes

“I wish I had given Dad those shaves,” I sniffled last night. He’s been gone since February, so my wife was baffled, by both my emotion and cryptic remark. She hugged me and gently asked, “What’s wrong, Hon?” I explained that because of my fever and upper respiratory infection, I laid around for two days. I didn’t get showered and shaved as I do every morning. Finally last night when I did, it felt so good, so “normal.” I remembered that when my Dad was confined to his bed in those last months of his life that he used to ask me to give him a shave. Often I’d respond, “Come on, Dad. You look fine.” Only yesterday, too late, did I realize that his desire to be shaved was not about whiskers, but about reclaiming some kind of “normal” in his life. One of his daily rituals for 50+ years was to shave in the early morning.

Are you prone to suggest, by your words or actions, that another’s problems are not really as bad as they think? The old proverb that suggests we should not judge another until we “walk a mile in his moccasins” comes to mind! What is of little significance to us, may be of real importance to another. Just because we do not or cannot understand, does not give us the right to be dismissive. Yet, we often are. That person struggling with addiction needs empathy as much as instruction! The one depressed because of a debilitating illness needs more than ‘the facts.’ They need us to genuinely care about how they are coping.

The Word urges us to be responsible for ourselves and for one another.
"Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ. If you think you are too important to help someone, you are only fooling yourself. You are not that important. Pay careful attention to your own work, for then you will get the satisfaction of a job well done, and you won’t need to compare yourself to anyone else. For we are each responsible for our own conduct." (Galatians 6:2-5, NLT) Most of us tend to slide to one extreme or the other. Either we care so deeply that we give them ‘smother love’ which fails to help them move in the direction of being strong and self-sufficient, or we don’t care enough and refuse to share the burdens of life, perhaps giving just a nod towards the need while expecting them to find their own way.

When you extend a hand to another, include empathy; a genuine appreciation of the emotional context of the other person’s need. In this we show to others a love of the quality that Christ has shown us. "Think of yourselves the way Christ Jesus thought of himself. He had equal status with God but didn’t think so much of himself that he had to cling to the advantages of that status no matter what. Not at all. When the time came, he set aside the privileges of deity and took on the status of a slave, became human!" (Philippians 2:5-7, The Message)

Here’ a word from the Word to think over today.
"If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." (Ecclesiastes 4:10-12, NIV)
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Lord, give us genuine compassion for others,
the ability to see not only their expressed need,
but also the content of their heart.
Help us to open our hearts and our ears,and so to become people that love as You love.Amen!