Married or just living together?

Many couples find no reason to take the step of getting married.  “We love each other,” they profess; and they do! “We are committed to each other,” and they are – to an extent; but not enough to commit to marriage.  What difference does that little piece of paper make? A very BIG difference.  Ask any person who has survived a divorce. Those who live together can part company with minimal fuss.  No, I am not minimizing the pain or hurt of a break-up, but without marriage there are no property laws or support requirements to contend with.  Laws governing divorce are designed to encourage couples to stay married, to work out their problems.  Marriage provides stability, encourages responsibility, and gives exclusive privilege rights to spouses.

Yesterday’s blog (A Serving of Jesus) urged commitment to the local church and challenged the consumer orientation in Christianity that makes it ‘all about me.’  A reader wrote to me:  “Here in ____ where there are churches aplenty, in 8 year’s time I have yet to find one holding anything more powerful than "the form of religion, yet lacking the power thereof.”  I participate in a Sunday Bible study but skip the service that follows.  Am I simply a consumer, … or, am I a man of principle, refusing to settle for less than a powerful, Spirit-filled experience? "  I understand his question and know it is framed in sincerity.  My answer in part would encourage that man to find and marry a local church – for his own sake and in obedience to Christ’s will.

Another friend of mine has attended the same church for more than 30 years.  He’s endured leadership decisions that went against his principles. He’s experienced shifts in worship that are not in keeping with his preferences. He’s put up with  preaching that did not ‘feed’ his soul.  He’s seen changes come that have diminished his ability to find a place of ministry after years of dedicated involved; but he knows that the church does not exist to provide a customized spiritual experience for him.  Just to be clear, he has not been a dissenting critic, either. He joyfully supports his church and desires her growth for the glory of Christ. He married that local congregation, and in obedience to the Lord’s calling, continues to support her.  Both he and that church are richer for his choice!

There is a depth of character that develops in those who choose commitment over convenience.  In death to Self, there is a discovery of Christ Jesus and His Presence that cannot be obtained by those who carefully protect themselves.  It is comparable to seeing a married couple who have pressed through the stresses involved in raising children, who have worked at building a home, who have endured serious illness together, who have confronted mortality as they buried their parents.  That man and woman move past love that seeks self-fulfillment and find a love that is mutually beneficial, that makes them one – in heart and mind.  Paradoxically, in their loss of Self, they open the door to discovery of deeper fulfillment.  In much the same way, those who stay with a local congregation, regardless of their feelings of the moment, will learn to love Christ in a selfless way.

Consider what Paul says about the Church.  As you read his words, remember he was not treated kindly by those with whom he fellowshipped!  Congregations criticized him. Some turned against him.  Still, he knows the value of the Church, even in her imperfection. "Now these are the gifts Christ gave to the church: the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, and the pastors and teachers. Their responsibility is to equip God’s people to do his work and build up the church, the body of Christ. This will continue until we all come to such unity in our faith and knowledge of God’s Son that we will be mature in the Lord, measuring up to the full and complete standard of Christ. Then we will no longer be immature like children. We won’t be tossed and blown about by every wind of new teaching. We will not be influenced when people try to trick us with lies so clever they sound like the truth. Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church." (Ephesians 4:10-15, NLT)

Note the intermingled images of marriage and church in this passage. "For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything. For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself." (Ephesians 5:23-28, NLT)

Ask yourself – “Am I ready to stop just living with my church and to marry her?”

_______________

The Church's one foundation

Is Jesus Christ, her Lord.

She is His new creation

By water and the Word.

From heav'n He came and sought her

To be His holy bride,

With His own blood He bought her,

And for her life He died.

Elect from every nation

Yet one o'er all the earth.

Her charter of salvation:

One Lord, one faith, one birth!

One holy Name she blesses,

Partakes one holy food,

And to one hope she presses

With every grace endued.

'Mid toil and tribulation

And tumult of her war,

She waits the consummation

Of peace forevermore.

‘Till with the vision glorious

Her longing eyes are blest

And the great Church victorious,

Shall be the Church at rest.

Yet she on earth hath union,

With God, the Three in One,

And mystic sweet communion

With those whose rest is won.

O happy ones and holy,

Lord, give us grace that we

Like them, the meek and lowly,

On high may dwell with Thee.

Samuel John Stone | Samuel Sebastian Wesley

© Words: Public Domain

A Serving of Jesus, with a sprinkle of the Spirit

A serving of Jesus with a sprinkle of the Spirit

The ad for the resort promised a customized experience shaped to a ‘perfect fit for your expectations.’  That is great marketing to Americans who are accustomed to having things their way. Have you ever stood at a Starbucks counter and listened to the endless string of directions for preparing coffee? The day of ordering ‘cream and suger, please,’ are gone! There are hundreds of combinations of coffee roasts, flavors, creamers, sweeteners - all mixed to meet the taste of the individual consumer. Our wealth allows us to demand life on our terms. 

And... we have become consumers at church. We want an experience that is matched to our preferences, doctrine that accommodates our personal sins. The explosion of independent churches in America are evidence of this. We are unwilling to bend ourselves so we ‘shop’ for a church that matches our expectations in size, worship style, music, type of preaching, and doctrine. As you read that, you might be wondering why that is even an issue, right?  Consumerism is so engrained in our thought processes, it does not even occur to us that it might be wrong to demand a serving of Jesus, with a sprinkle of the Spirit!

Bill Hull asks pastors to carefully consider if they are making Believers or Disciples.  A believer gives mental assent to the existence of God and the Person of Jesus Christ. He holds certain ideals as being true, but abstract.  Hull goes on to write, “Discipleship is a state of being. It is not directly a devotional life, but it is a life of devotion. It is not about more church, more meetings, and greater discipline- it is about learning to live one’s life as though Christ were living it. It is the reality of Christ in one’s life in all life’s events and circumstances.”

A disciple gives up his own way to become a follower of the Way.  He does not even consider his own pleasure, preference, or expectations. His fulfillment is found in surrender, in re-shaping his will to the will of his Lord.  Is that hard?  Any answer other than ‘yes,’ would be a lie!  Discipleship demands death to Self.  Jesus does not consider our feelings in His demands, but He does promise that if we will become disciples who endure, the reward is rich, beyond our imagination. 

Read His invitation thoughtfully.  "Large crowds were traveling with Jesus, and turning to them he said: “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters-yes, even his own life-he cannot be my disciple. And anyone who does not carry his cross and follow me cannot be my disciple." (Luke 14:25-27, NIV) "Then Peter said to him, “We’ve given up everything to follow you. What will we get?”  Don’t you love good, ole Pete?  He says what we all think!  How did Jesus answer his question?  Jesus replied, “I assure you that when the world is made new and the Son of Man sits upon his glorious throne, you who have been my followers will also sit on twelve thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel. And everyone who has given up houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or property, for my sake, will receive a hundred times as much in return and will inherit eternal life. But many who are the greatest now will be least important then, and those who seem least important now will be the greatest then." (Matthew 19:27-30, NLT)

Meditate on the example of Moses. May his life inspire us to go beyond being Believers to becoming Disciples. "By faith, Moses, when grown, refused the privileges of the Egyptian royal house. He chose a hard life with God’s people rather than an opportunistic soft life of sin with the oppressors. He valued suffering in the Messiah’s camp far greater than Egyptian wealth because he was looking ahead, anticipating the payoff. By an act of faith, he turned his heel on Egypt, indifferent to the king’s blind rage. He had his eye on the One no eye can see, and kept right on going." (Hebrews 11:24-27, The Message)

_______________

Father, I recognize that the love of Self goes deep in me.

When my will is frustrated, I work at reshaping life to my own expectations.

I confess that I am too willing to ask for Your forgiveness,

Rather than to seek Your will.

Bend my stubborn heart to Your ways.

Enlarge my vision to see beyond today,

To choose with eternity in sight.

Remind me that what I 'lose' in pursuit of You,

is nothing compared to what is gained in Your welcome.

Jesus Christ, be Lord of my loves, my thoughts, my heart and my mind.

Amen

One More Surrender

“That’s not me,” I thought while trying to keep a mental distance from ‘those people.’  I found comfort in thinking that I had somehow become better than people who sinned in this way or that. When I heard of some Pastor who fell into sin of one kind or another, I told myself, “Not me, I’m too disciplined, careful, prayerful …” pride forms long lists that distinguish ‘us’ from ‘them.’  But, truth is, it is revealed that I am completely capable of sinning and I always have been.  But, even as I professed my trust in the grace of Christ to save me from my sin, I was blinded to my sin of spiritual pride – the very sin I thought I hated most!

Humiliation is not enjoyable, in the least. But I am beginning to understand that it strips away our pretensions and teaches us to cling to Christ. Only then is it even possible for us to love the lost, the lonely, the broken, the bruised, the fallen, the failing – like Jesus did! Paul, a man who was a proud Pharisee, lost his reputation, became a despised man.  If you know the New Testament, you probably think I’m talking about his loss of stature among the Jews following his conversion. That is true, but there was a greater humiliation in store for him.  Even the Christians he brought to Jesus came to despise him!  God allowed him to be accused, attacked, and rejected to rip pride out of his heart.  He writes - "If I have to “brag” about myself, I’ll brag about the humiliations that make me like Jesus." (2 Corinthians 11:30, The Message)

Will you allow God to humiliate you?  Do not rush to answer that question too quickly!  But, hopefully, in full faith, you can eventually say, “Yes, Lord, whatever it takes for me to be like You.”  (My body shudders even as I write those words because there is such a cost wrapped up in them.) 

American Christianity is about becoming powerful, enjoying status, having respect, claiming a place as a ‘King’s kid.’  But all that misses what the Bible shows about becoming like Jesus. He could not be our Savior until He submitted Himself to humiliation, gave away all of His divine rights, and stood alongside of us who were sinners. "You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had. Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. Instead, he gave up his divine privileges; he took the humble position of a slave and was born as a human being." (Philippians 2:5-7, NLT)  He went further!  He submitted Himself, in the will of God, to the ignominy of crucifixion.  Stripped of respect as well as His clothes, He hung naked on a cross, identified with the outcasts, reviled by the respected.  On the Cross, He became the Bridge of God’s grace to sinful humanity.

There is a cross for each of us. Paul, whose humiliation I spoke of, said - "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. I do not set aside the grace of God, for if righteousness could be gained through the law, Christ died for nothing!” (Galatians 2:20-21, NIV)   The Message, a contemporary translation of the Bible, says it with these words:  “I have been crucified with Christ. My ego is no longer central. It is no longer important that I appear righteous before you or have your good opinion, and I am no longer driven to impress God. Christ lives in me. The life you see me living is not “mine,” but it is lived by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. I am not going to go back on that. Is it not clear to you that to go back to that old rule-keeping, peer-pleasing religion would be an abandonment of everything personal and free in my relationship with God? I refuse to do that, to repudiate God’s grace. If a living relationship with God could come by rule-keeping, then Christ died unnecessarily.”

Do you want to love like Jesus?

Do you want to be a person through whom He is able to show His love?

Then, there’s a cross for you.  He invites you to “turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross daily, and follow me. If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it." (Luke 9:23-24, NLT)

The wonder of all this is that when we have lost all we treasured here on this earth, we then find the treasure that is most precious.  We cannot possess the latter until we have let go of the former.

Here’s the word from the Word.  May it keep us in the trials of humiliation that make us like Jesus.  Because of His submission, "God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed—not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence—continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose. Do everything without complaining." (Philippians 2:9-14, NIV)

__________

I Surrender All

All to Jesus I surrender,

All to Him I freely give.

I will ever love and trust Him,

In His presence daily live.

All to Jesus I surrender,

Humbly at His feet I bow.

Worldly pleasures all forsaken,

Take me Jesus take me now.

All to Jesus I surrender,

Make me Savior wholly Thine.

Let me feel the Holy Spirit,

Truly know that Thou art mine.

I surrender all!

I surrender all!

All to Thee, my blessed Savior,

I surrender all.

Judson Wheeler Van DeVenter | Winfield Scott Weeden

© Words: Public Domain
 ___________________

I'm taking a break. Lord-willing, I will publish CoffeeBreak again next week. Happy Thanksgiving!

Love my team!

Our church’s gym was full of children and their parents for an event last night.  With fresh perspective, sharpened by adversity, I realized how many amazing people are part of the ministry team at Faith Discovery Church. They are good men and women who care deeply about His work. They are ‘volunteers’ but in reality give countless hours to service. I am blessed to lead this fellowship.

A church that is functioning as God intended is a team of dedicated people who work to advance the Kingdom of God on earth. It is not a theatre where many gather to watch a few perform! It is a community where many are gifted, in dozens of ways, to work to bring about a mutual benefit, all for the glory of God. Our fellowship has a simple statement of purpose. We exist to 'help people discover God's purpose for their lives!' When you know how to discern the will of God and live in the center of His plans - that is life lived to its richest potential!

So, we are committed to giving people the skills, the support, and the opportunity to say "yes!" We do it in many ways-
-the Sunday morning corporate worship experience that includes a teaching of the Word,
-in a Christian school that educates children in a Christ-centered setting,
-in student ministry and a downtown teen center,
-with material published on the Internet that reach out to the wider world,
-in specialized outreach such as prison and nursing home work,
-in food pantry that offers tangible expressions of Christ's love, and
-in small groups that pray, share, and learn how to please the Father!

Can a single pastor do all that? A team of people make it happen!
Leaders, lead. Singers, sing. Musicians, make music! Those with creative gifts, create! Teachers, teach! There are many with less public roles - changing light bulbs, printing literature, pushing a vacuum cleaners, driving mowers, running tech support, interceding in prayer, giving money... that are just as much a part of the work as I am, even though everybody sees me standing front and center on Sunday morning! The team is the greatest resource the church has, apart from the Spirit Himself.

An oft-quoted proverb, attributed to the Chinese, says:
If your vision is for a year, cultivate wheat!
If your vision is for a decade, cultivate trees!
If your vision is for a lifetime, cultivate people!

Let me encourage you to find a place to serve God actively - whether in a 'recognized' ministry of the church or in some place in the community. If you want to be one of God's MVP's (Most Valuable Players) there are a few choices to be made.
-Know your service will be effective when you are equipped by the Spirit, not just because of your talents.
-God's glory is the issue, not your sense of accomplishment. Set aside any need to be recognized and/or rewarded.
-Play the position He puts you in without comparing yourself to others. He calls each of us to our place and our eternal reward is for faithfulness, not visibility.
-Serve humbly, doing your best while thanking God for the privilege of being on His team.

"You were all called to travel on the same road and in the same direction, so stay together, both outwardly and inwardly. You have one Master, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all, who rules over all, works through all, and is present in all. Everything you are and think and do is permeated with Oneness. But that doesn’t mean you should all look and speak and act the same.
Out of the generosity of Christ, each of us is given his own gift. . . . He handed out gifts above and below, filled heaven with his gifts, filled earth with his gifts. He handed out gifts of apostle, prophet, evangelist, and pastor-teacher to train Christ’s followers in skilled servant work, working within Christ’s body, the church, until we’re all moving rhythmically and easily with each other, efficient and graceful in response to God’s Son, fully mature adults, fully developed within and without, fully alive like Christ.

No prolonged infancies among us, please. ... God wants us to grow up, to know the whole truth and tell it in love—like Christ in everything. We take our lead from Christ, who is the source of everything we do. He keeps us in step with each other. His very breath and blood flow through us, nourishing us so that we will grow up healthy in God, robust in love." (Ephesians 4:4-16, The Message)