A Good Loser?

There are hundreds of books that teach us skills we need to win. Some counsel on the ways of building wealth, others on the agility necessary to mastering a game. But, I am convinced that a skill most needed is that of learning how to lose well! The fact is that we all lose, probably more than we win. It is a fact of life - Nobody wins everytime! It is what we do with the disappointments the come with loss that marks us as great people.

In her book, Team of Rivals, Doris Kearns Goodwin recounts the story of Abraham Lincoln and Edwin Stanton, two men who met in 1854. One was a country lawyer from Illinois, the other a cultured lawyer from Washington, DC. A big case was to be heard in Illinois, so Stanton's firm retained a local lawyer, Lincoln, just to make a connection with the local judge. Lincoln did not know this so he spent weeks preparing for the case. When Stanton came to Illinois for the case, he ignored Lincoln's work completely. He insulted Lincoln endlessly, until finally Lincoln withdrew from the case, losing his ability to gain compensation. Five years later, Lincoln was the President of the United States and Stanton was the outgoing Attorney General. Lincoln needed a man to run the War Department as the nation was in the crisis of the Civil War. Stanton, his old critic, was the man recommended by many. Lincoln had not forgotten the insults, public and private, that Stanton had rained on him, yet he swallowed his pride and appointed the man for the good of the nation. In the end, they became stalwart allies and Stanton served his President faithfully until the day Lincoln was shot. Stanton mourned Lincoln intensely in death.

How was Lincoln able to choose a man for high office who had previously treated him with such contempt? Because Lincoln had learned to deal with adversity as a result of many losses in his life. He had endured poverty, overcame the early death of family members, lived through successive hardships, and suffered multiple political defeats on his way to the Presidency. Along the way, he had discovered that suffering can be an excellent teacher. He knew that today's loss is an opportunity to make the choices for tomorrow's success! A man less acquainted with personal hardships may well have lacked the courage, grit, and endurance to lead the nation through that dark time that preserved the Union at such terrible cost in life. Suffering had produced a person of great character who realized that the world did not exist to serve him; but that he existed to serve others in this world.

Do you complain bitterly when you are faced with loss?
Do you love to rehearse your sorrows so as to gain the sympathies of others?
Do you carefully protect yourself, your time, your resources from situations that might be costly, or demand inconvenience?
If you answer consistently answer with a 'yes,' dear Believer, then you will be of little use in the work of God.

Jesus Christ lays down these words of uncompromising challenge to each of us who would be part of His work in the world.
"If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it. What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul?" (Matthew 16:24-26, NIV)
His call is not to stoicism!
He does not demand detachment, nor a stiff upper lip!
Jesus was a man of tenderest emotions. He wept at the death of his friend, Lazarus. He wept over the city of Jerusalem, knowing the judgment that awaited her. He was touched by the hunger of the crowd, the pain of the sick, and the hopelessness of those controlled by evil. He willingly took on the 'loss' of His Glory as God, to become a Man, and to become sin for us all. And why? For the joy of doing the will of God, for that is was, and is, the greatest Win-Win ever! In our obedience to His will, God's Kingdom advances, we are blessed eternally.

Often our bitter wails and manipulations are born of an overdeveloped sense of entitlement! We do not say it in so many words, but the thought is there too often, "God, I am owed a better deal than this!" Truthfully, He owes us nothing, but gives us all things by His grace as we are able to receive them with thanksgiving, holding them loosely, and ready to use them for His purposes. When you find yourself in a hard place today, pray for the grace to give real thanks to God for His purposes in that moment. Careful now. Do not give the fraudulent words of empty praise to Him that is unmatched by a worshipful heart. Surrender yourself, from the first moment of the day, to His reign. Commit yourself to accepting wins and losses with equal grace, as the Lord helps you. A paradox that is amazing results. You will begin to experience greater joy as you live nearer to the Heart of God, which will increase the love that you enjoy for God, and from others. "Whoever loses his life for Me, will find it!"

Here is a word from the Word for your meditation today:
"I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ—the righteousness that comes from God and is by faith." (Philippians 3:8-9, NIV)
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All to Jesus I surrender,
All to Him I freely give;
I will ever love and trust Him,
In His presence daily live.

All to Jesus I surrender,
Lord I give myself to Thee.
Fill me with Thy love and power;
Let Thy blessings fall on me.

I surrender all,
I surrender all.
All to Thee my blessed Savior,
I surrender all.

I Surrender All
Van DeVenter, Weeden© Public Domain